Good 'Ole May term

So I'm here for May term and today commenced the first day of classes. I start out with walk, jog, run and then have old testament for 3 hours. Cake work load. I work in the evenings at the coffee shop which is pretty dead right now. It's quite nice. I cook for myself, lay out and read, run whenever. It's nice to not be so busy but to still have structure to my day...I need that. Another GREAT perk to May term, heck, school in general is the GREAT internet access we get.....ours has been out for the past few days...joy. I didn't think it was that hard to keep it up and running.....the rest of campus has it, just not our flipping house. Anyways, that's about all I have to say....pretty boring and dead around here.

I am Sam

I just got done watching that movie. It'd been awhile since I'd watched it. It's such an incredible movie. One of my favorite parts is where they're taping the answering machine message....priceless. Jon and I definitely rewound that part....haha. The movie reminded me of summer camp at the YMCA and the autistic kids I worked with. They are such incredible kids and being able to spend a couple summers with them was truely a blessing. Sure they're handful but what kid isn't, eh? I'll never forget singing "The Bear Necessities", "Mr. Rodgers", and "Winnie the Pooh" over and over and over with Blake or picking sprinkles off Trevor's cookies and watching Jonathan run after him streaking through the pool or catching bugs with Casey and talking about the Lion King 70 billion times a day or listening to Brock tell a story word-for-word from a Read to me book or him playing with the other kids like he never has before. I love those memories and it's experiences like those and movies like I Am Sam that remind me that they really are a blessing from God and He has a purpose for these kids. They may not be the smartest kids in the world, but they know how to love and I've experienced that. They reminded me to sit back and enjoy little things. So if you ever have the chance to work with an autistic child, jump at the chance cause it's not just them who will grow, but you as well.

Scarlet vs. Gray

Today was the big Spring Game for the OSU Buckeyes and I got to go!! Rose, Jonathan and I went to watch the annual scrimmage. Rose was rooting for gray; Jon and I were going for scarlet (I prefer the name 'scarlet' over gray...lol) and scarlet dominated! They won 13-0. We went to Rose and had our little 'pregame' steak lunch....yum! Rose and I were decked out in our OSU shirts while Jonathan (i love this part) had a BLUE t-shirt on....sheesh....what was he thinking?!?!?! I saw a flag that had the Michigan 'M' on it and a screw in the corner....lol.....gotta love the rivalry there! It was great to walk into the stadium with over 25,000 other fans, decked out in their OSU clothes and hats and such. They sang the OSU song and it gave me chills to hear everyone there singing...so cool! Man, even the tulips planted outside were OSU colors! How great is that?!?! And, of course, the band played 'Hang on Sloopy'...yet another great Ohio tradition. It was a gorgeous day for football, although my skin is now one of the OSU colors. So, all-in-all...great day! "....how firm thy friendship, O-H-I-O!"

She's legal folks!

One of the perks to turning 21 is getting a new license. I thought about doing something crazy, like dying my hair some odd color but decided against it. I just can't believe I'm 21....it was my last good birthday but boy was it good! And no, I haven't drank. I've been asked that many times already. Another thing I can do now is drive with my little brother, Josh. He's 15 and has his permit and since I'm 21, he can get driving hours in with me.....scary. Not sure how I feel about that...actually, I'll tell ya how I feel...OLD!! My little broham is almost 16...sheesh...where does time go?!? I was just talking to a friend last night about dating crap...you know, the usual. I was talking about how completely content I am with being single and not ready but how time's kinda running out, not completely but you know what I mean. Then we discussing when is a good time to have kids (don't ask how the heck we got on these topics...you know how aol conversations go....to pot they do). I realized my 'ideal' time to have kids is within like 5 years from now...yikes!! Might be moving that back...haha....considering I am single and like it that way. Amazing to me how the older I get, the more content I am with being single.....thank you Lord.....how I hated those days when I longed for a boyfriend.....it was depressing. So, yea! to all you who are single...live it up!

Ending with a BANG!!

Well, school is done....I'm excited and sad all at once. I love school but I was definitely ready to be done with some classes. I got ripped apart by a few of my exams...this was definitely the WORST exam week I've had so far in my college career. BUT, lo' and behold, my AWESOME friends from home came and surprised me for my 21st!!! I was going to my car, about in tears cause of my awful exam and I look out the window and see Rose, Courtney, Scott, and Jonathan walking my way. Surprised is an understatement! I was SOOOO pumped to see them!! I come to find out that Rose had been planning this for awhile with people here at IWU. I go back to the house to find flowers from mom and dad, cookies from mom, and signs all over the house made by Bethany and Rose. I was so happy!! :) The party that night rocked! It was so much fun to have one last sha-bang before everyone left for the summer (tear). From dancing, the Worm, eating, guitar playing, song written by Brandon and Joel, euchre, the limbo, etc......great times! I just love my friends and I'm definitely gonna miss them this summer. I love that I have friends who will skip classes and work to drive all the way to boring Indiana to surprise me (first time I've ever had a surprise on my birthday...job well done). So, I had a great birthday, after finals were over, that is, and I will miss all you IWU people dearly. Thanks for making my 21st fabulous!

Finals and Encouragement

Finals...gross....I hate them, no I LOATHE them!! I've never failed a test as badly as I just failed my physiology test. I wanted to cry and scream all at the same time, so I ate ice cream...it makes everything better :) In talking with some other people from class, I found out that my failing grade was about average....I think that speaks for itself....the test sucked and was incredibly hard. So this leads me to my second thought: encouragement. No, I'm not trying to get encouragement from everyone cause my test sucked, I just want to discuss it for a second cause it's been brought to my attention. I've realized just how little we encourage each other. Someone this week was very encouraging to me and I realized that there aren't many people like this person. We hesitate to say what we're thinking or take the time to write a note, fearing that the person will read into it. Who cares!?!? Do a random act of kindness or encouragement. If you think a friend has a great personality trait..tell them!! God calls us to encourage one another daily. What have you done or said to another person today to obey that command?? By the way, I like your pants, and if you don't have pants on, well..um....put some on. :)

I love the month of April!!

I absolutely love April! Warm weather, sunshine, end of school, flowers and my birthday.....all in the same month! How fabulous is that?!?! I wore a tanktop for the first time this year! I love the feel of warm wind in my hair, being able to roll the windows down, turn the music on, and wear sunglasses and flipflops. I got to lay out today for a good hour and it felt so good! Then I went and rollerbladed with Jenny...so much fun! I love how everyone's out laying out or playing. It's so therapeutic! Yea for sunshine inducing seratonin release!! (bit of physiology for ya)
The end of the year is kinda bittersweet. I only have one year left....one year! Wow! It's gone so incredibly fast!! I love IWU and will miss it but at the same time, I'll be ready to be done with classes and go out and teach on my own.
So my birthday is Wednesday....the big 21 and no I'm not going out drinking. (I swear I've been asked that a million times already) I've been excited about it but recently I realized it really will be my last good birthday....no one goes, "Hey! It's my 26th birthday! Yea!! PARTY!!!" No, after this it's a mere, "Happy birthday Jen." Kinda sad....and then I get to the part where I dread my birthday. Wow, time flies. 21...an adult...sheesh....such a loaded statement.
Oh, and another thing,....April's also the best month cause it's birthstone is a diamond. Heck ya! Girls, I know you understand...no explanation needed.

Daffodils

Today, while walking toward the Student Center from the PPAC after chapel, I noticed some daffodils around one of the trees. I ran and picked one as everyone yelled at me. Do I care? No, and I'll tell ya why. I LOVE daffodils!! They're so bright and cheery and I absolutely love their smell. They're my favorite flower and guess what??? They're bulbs (that means that they bloom year after year after year) so I don't kill them when I pick them, I merely take a piece of their happiness with me. So there's my reasoning behind picking them. To me, they're a little piece of heaven, a kiss from God, and so I will continue to pick an occasional daffodil to brighten my day! :)

Oh to enjoy Science again.........

I'm so sick of Embryology I could scream. I can't ever find what the heck he's talking about on my slides without his help. Why you ask? Cause every person's set of slides looks different cause they're cut different and stained different and heck, they're different animals!! I get soo frustrated when he has this whole, "It's so easy! You should know this!" attitude. I just think I'm getting really sick of science. I just wish I had time to enjoy them. What's enjoyment consist of? Learning on my own. Scuba diving down 70 feet and identifying fish, shrimp, turtles, sponges and coral; walking through a conservatory of orchids learning the different types and the special characteristics that make them unique and so complex; getting hurt and knowing what you injured; going to the doctor or watching ER and understanding what they're talking about; taking a group of campers to a stream and catching crayfish and showing them how to tell if it's a boy or a girl; dissecting a chicken embryo at 48 hours of development and watching the heart beat under the microscope. THAT is why I love science! I get to study God's incredible creation! How stinkin' awesome is that?!? Ok, so I know some of you don't agree and that's ok but hey, I do and that's why I'll have a job someday cause most don't like it and I do. :) So ya, I just can't wait til it's over cause it's all so rushed and I hate being rushed like this...I don't learn well. Only a few more days Jen, just a few more days.

Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest one of all?

I sat down and watched The Swan with Kara tonight. I don't agree with the show but still was intrigued and proceeded to watch it. They take 2 women who don't like their bodies and have low self-esteem and transform them into 'swans', if you will. Neither of the women were ugly and neither were incredibly overweight. I just appauled and amazed at how much emphasis society places on being thin and beautiful. We're to the point now where if you have the money (or are ugly enough to be chosen to be on TV) you can pay to basically become a different person physically. After the Swan, Miss USA was on. It about made me sick. These women were so deathly thin, it was gross. What are we doing?!?! We're creating this false image of beauty! Girls everywhere starve themselves to look like this image only to find that when they achieve it, they're still as empty as before. One of the women on the Swan kept saying that she wanted to change the inside by this and all I could think of was, "Only Jesus can do that." He's the solution to the problem. There are definitley days I struggle with feeling ugly and not liking my body, but I have to turn my focus to Christ and remember that He made me and loves me no matter what I look like. I have to find my identity in Him and not my appearance. This, though, is a constant struggle due to these stupid shows and dumb magazines out there......oye....we're only hurting ourselves with this crap.

Caffeine!!!
Well, my week of no caffeine is now over and what did I drink this morning? Tea! I was so excited!! I've missed the taste of coffee and tea more than the caffeine. I've drank so much of my mom's iced tea today, I think my kidneys are going through shock right now. Here's my conclusion from this past week: Yes, I'm addicted to caffeine and need it to stay awake in Embryology. I plan on limiting my intake a little more and I know that will be easier when school is over and I don't need to go through 4 classes on 4-5 hours of sleep. So i proved to myself that I have the willpower to give it up. I've already given up pop for a year. Maybe next I'll try sweets....I did that once for an entire month. It is possible....it's all in your head. Why do this, you may ask? Because I find that I get to points where I can't say no to coffee or chocolate or sweets and so if I give them up for awhile, it enables me to control my cravings better and not gorge myself. It's also a challenge to myself. So on that note...I'm off to finish my cup of hot tea....don't worry...it's decaf ;)

The Passion

I went and saw The Passion today with my mom. What an incredible and intense movie. I cannot begin to describe it; you just have to see it for yourself. It was not a movie I was excited to see because I know the story of Jesus' crucifixion and I knew the movie would be very lifelike and gruesome. Boy, was it ever. I sobbed so much in the movie. I can't believe He actually went through all that and made it so long after being flogged. I've heard the story so many times and had become numb to it's effect. I needed to see this movie to be reminded of just how much pain Christ went through for me. I can't imagine being or even watching those soldiers beat him so badly and laughing as they ripped away flesh. There were times in the movie I couldn't watch because it was so gruesome and difficult to watch. I kept thinking, "my sin did this." How many times have I thought, "it's just so difficult to give up or quite doing."?!? That movie sure did put it in perspective. It's not so difficult now. I understand more what it did and what it still does every time I do it. Can He still feel the pain every time I sin? I just picture that face so brutally beaten, blood dripping from the crown of thorns, eyes bloodshot and barely open looking at me and to think that His pain and death bought my ticket to heaven. Put it in another perspective: Imagine your dad doing that for you; flogged 40 times, punched, spat at, crown of thorns dug into his head and crucified because of your wrong doings. I don't think I'd ever forgive myself and yet Christ does. This Easter will be different for me. Christ's death and resurrection have taken on a whole new light and I hope and pray I never forget nor lose that.

The Prince and Me......

So tonight I went and saw The Prince and Me with my friend Rose and a group of high school freshmen that she leads a Bible study with. What a great movie!! Ok, so it was a chick-flick but I happened to love it! The ending was slightly different but I thought it was good because it emphasized following your dreams/aspirations/goals and that you (girls) are good enough to be chased after by that special someone. I so agree!! I have so many things I wanna do someday and this movie reminded me that I can do those things and still have 'someone'....that I can share those things with him. This movie also reawakened that intense desire for a boyfriend, not that it completely went away but I've been ok and content with being single for awhile now. So needless to say, I loved the movie and will probably buy it.

Before we went to see the movie, we had, what Rose called, an 'open-ended discussion' on BOYS with the high school girls. It was actually really neat. We had the girls write down one question, any question, about boys, dating, whatever that they wanted answered. So we went through things like "what's too far?", "when's a good time to start dating?", "is kissing wrong" (insert Jen's NO!---sorry, side bar), "where in the Bible does it say that messing around is too far and that sex before marriage is wrong?", etc. I was amused that three girls with little dating experience were the panel, but I guess that's good cause here we were talking about purity and saving yourself in all areas of dating so I guess the fact that we hadn't 'gotten around', if you will, was a good thing. It's so important for these girls to here these things and be encouraged to save themselves for their future spouse, and not just in having sex but so many other things. I really hope that these girls keep their stands to stay pure and set the bar high when it comes to their standards and lines within a relationship cause a guy worth dating is a guy who not only respects that but has drawn the same lines.

Back to Elementary School

Today in Literacy in Diverse Classrooms (a class that teaches how to incorporate reading and writing into every content area) we had presentations by the history and music groups on incorporating reading and writing into their content area. The history group was going to show the School House Rock song/cartoon about passing a bill but it wouldn't work...I was disappointed. Well, then the music group had us circle up on the floor and sing a Native American song and then they gave us a Native American poem and half of us had to come up with motions and the other half used instruments to go along with it. My group was the motions group. We had colored scarves that we used for our 'interpretive dance', if you will. I laughed so hard! We had so much fun expressing 'dancing teepees' and high mountain tops. I felt like I was in elementary school again and I loved it! It's so fun to be a kid every once in awhile in classes and today was that day.
I've come to realize that I've learned more from this class than I realized. I just got my student teaching placements yesterday and the second one is with the same teacher I had for practicum this year. You'd think that'd be good but not exactly. You see, the teacher gives open book tests and the kids fail them. Something's very wrong here. Part of it is their lack of interest or care for the class so that is my first challenge: to grab their attention and get them involved. The other part, I believe after having Literacy in Diverse Classrooms, is that these kids are very poor readers. If they can't even take an open book test where you basically find the bold words and fill it in on the test, then, in my opinion, they are having difficulty comprehending what they are reading so it will be my job and my mission to improve this and work on their reading skills while teaching science. Could be rough. Anyways, that was a very 'education major' oriented paragraph, but hey, that's me.

What a gorgeous day!! I just had a good 3 mile run with Brandon and a girl I just met named Jenny. I'm so out of shape, but hey, at least I ran. It feels like Friday to me. I didn't have any class today which has been fantastic!! I did, though, have a dumb Student Teacher meeting at 6:45am so I rolled out of bed and threw on some khakis and a nice shirt (we had to look nice) and put a little makeup on (I figure if I didn't it'd be obvious I just rolled out of bed...lol) and went. I came back and slept for a good 2 hours til I had to get up for chapel.

So I talked with mom today...it's been awhile since we've talked and I'm just so amazed by her. She works in a factory she doesn't enjoy and yet sees it as a ministry opportunity. She's invited a couple of ladies she works with to come to church and even invited an Albanian woman to Easter lunch. She keeps praying for God to use her and it's really exciting to see how he's using her and I think at the same time teaching her that it may not be the greatest job but He has a purpose for her there and He can work through her. My mom's just an amazing woman and I hope I can someday be just as good a mom to my kids as she has been to us.

Hot Chocolate Mess
Since I can't have coffee or tea for the next week, I decided after lunch today that I would get some of Baldwin's finest hot chocolate and top it off with some whipcream. It's the perfect cup of hot chocolate.....whipcream perfectly arranged in a circular fashion on top of my dark hot chocolate. Chris Boyer starts throwing things at it such as the table tops, salt and pepper shakers, my sunglasses...etc....Brandon reaches over and puts a piece of bamboo from his Asian noodle mess into my cup, destroying my perfect confectionary/liquid work of art. So I decide to pour my mug of hot chocolate on his tray. I try to miss his plate of pudding and end up missing the tray and pouring it all over his lap. He gasps, I gasp, we all gasp....and errupt in laughter. He is sitting there in awe, backed away from the table. I feel awful but am still laughing cause everyone is laughing too....it really is quite funny. Elisa and Jenny are across from him laughing hysterically; Dan is about to make a mess in his pants too, he's laughing so hard. Brandon goes to try and 'fix' the problem in the bathroom, comes back and moves away from me. lol. What a sport he is.... I apologized a million times but he agreed that it was funny. So I guess now he has to wash his jeans that he rarely does so to. Good times at lunch, good times I tell ya.

So I just got done watching CSI and I have this desire to become a detective now. I'm so intrigued by those shows! To be a forensic scientist and use footprints, blood, clothes, phone calls/messages, DNA,...you name it...to put the bad guy away....how cool is that?!?! To know you helped someone feel safe by helping to find evidence to convict someone. That would be so cool!! It's all linked to science and that's probably why I'm so fascinated. Put that on my list of things to do/become along with becoming a chef and earning my doctorate.


I think I ate my weight in animal crackers and Baked Lays today......darn those bridal showers....and darn my lack of will power.......i used it all up to give up coffee and tea for a week....gonna be tough

Wow...what a great weekend it's been! My great friends Courtney and Rose came out last night for FNL and to visit Jon and me. We had a great time playing Euchre before FNL, laughing through FNL, hanging out/dancing at What the Hall in Hodson, going to Spotted Cow (lame this year...very lame), going to the guys soccer scrimmage and just chillin' out talking and catching up. I just love my friends from back home and I realize just how blessed I am to have had such great friends in high school. We have remained close even after graduating. These girls are unlike any other. I can remember having girl's nights in high school and talking about our relationships with God, spiritual issues and of course, boys but not just boys in general but what we wanted in a future mate. It's been so awesome to see a few of them marrying 'that guy' they once talked about years ago. It's so refreshing to talk with girls who don't assume and analyze everything. They're very down to earth and just incredible women of God who challenge and encourage me in my walk. They're not so 'tunnel visioned', like many girls here, but are open-minded. I love those girls :)

Hugs...I just love them! And I don't think we get enough of them. Today I got one of the best hugs I've had in awhile from my good friend Dave. I love the fact that Dave is so personal and gives hugs, regardless of whether someone will 'assume' something or not. I appreciate people like him, Jen Anderson, Staci and Jenny because I always get a hug from them and I love that. My friends in high school always gave hugs before we left someone's house to go home...it was great!! I miss that. Those people brighten my day....we need more hugs around this place.


So I was reading the sojourn and my name is in it a few times for SGO and for the Nalgene bottle competition. Both times it was "Jen Bell". Yes, most people, if not all, call me Jen but for some reason I'm getting tired of "jenbell" as if it was one word. My name is Jennifer....I rarely get called that. Ya, Jen's fine, but I guess when my name is written, I prefer Jennifer....I know, odd. Oh well. Oh ya, really hate "Bell"...what am i, a guy?? I have a first name. sheesh. (climbing off my soap box now)

I attended the men's soccer team vs. faculty basketball game this evening and realized something: many people have a bad impression of the guy's soccer team. A comment was made concerning which team I was rooting for......the soccer team of course....if anything, I have blood on that team. A few comments were made concerning the guys on the team. During the course of the game, I talked to my good friend Adam Jones about the guys on the team and just how impressed I've been with a lot of them. This year's freshmen group has really surprised and impressed me. Ya, I know, I'm a little partial cause my brother's on the team but aside from that....there are some quality guys on that team. In fact, I think some of the best guys at IWU are on that team. It saddens me to hear people comment about some of the guys without even getting to know them. It's a reminder to me to be careful not to judge others. I too didn't really like the team the last few years, but I didn't know them.....I judged by what I saw and ASSUMED....that's the key word there.....people know a few or hear about it from others and generalize. Bad idea people. So here's my challenge....get to know a soccer player near you.....they're good guys...most...you'll always run into people you don't completely mesh with or like but I can guarantee you that you'll find a lot of them to be great, Christian guys.